Why do I have to be such a guy sometimes????

I know, it sounds crazy, but it's true.

She is in NYC right now for some Doctor appointments and will likely be coming back a bit more top heavy than when she went down there. I miss her like crazy, but when we get on the hone together, it's like all that goes into hiding and that is frustrating as hell. I don't know why that is, just that it annoys me. I try to be more open and stuff, but it is difficult. For some reason I just can't seem to bring myself to be emotional on the phone.

The other thing is that I feel like she is ignoring me now that she is getting some work done. I know that she is excited and nervous and all that, but hey, I have a life too and there are things going on in it that I want to share too. I am starting a new business of my own and I wanted to share that with her and when I was talking to her about it earlier, she said, "What business?" I was so upset, feeling like my life didn't matter to her. I don't like that either. I know that if I was the one going in for this surgery, I would be nervous as hell, of course, I have a more grounded idea of exactly what they are going to do, but that is just my background speaking (see previous post for that :))

I guess that part of the initial problem is that I spend so freaking much time on the phone for work that I don't know how to just talk on the phone any more. To me it has become something that I spend 12 hours a night doing as a job (no, as much as I know some of you would love it, I am not a sex line operator). I guess I just want her to realize that I really miss her too. She wanted me to talk a little dirty and all I could do was bust out laughing. I can't talk dirty wtih a straight face for some reason.

Ah well, I guess I just have to learn how to get past it. More updates to follow.